alien jodi home
jodi’s t shirts
jodi’s photos
jodi’s wash tips
jodi’s five adventures
alien jodi’s story
jJodi meets……….a disenfranchised elephant
Jodi discovered where the loud groaning was coming from, he circled the clump of trees one more time before coming to rest a few metres away – oh dear, what a noise thought Jodi, (he had learnt enough on his travels so far to recognise the difference between contented noises and discontented ones – ‘Snnoooorrrrtle, Grrrruunnntle, Snnoooorrrrtle, Snnoooorrrrtle, Grrrruunnntle, Grrrruunnntle,’ went the noise. Jodi couldn’t see anything in the clump of trees but he decided to go and investigate, there were some pretty strange things happening on this planet , and Jodi wouldn’t have been at all surprised if the trees had taken to groaning through pure frustration.
As he approached the trees, he noticed a large grey wrinkly stone lying in the middle of a clearing – ‘Snnoooorrrrtle, Snnoooooooorrrrtle! Grrrruunnntle, Grunt’ went the stone,hmm! thought Jodi, disgruntled stones hadn’t been on Jodi’s list of eventualities, suddenly the stone waved an arm, hmmmm, thought Jodi again, not good!, then the stone flapped its ears and started to get up – OH!!, this isn’t a stone, it’s some kind of animal with four legs.. and an… arm?. As the animal tried to get up it used it’s arm to try and steady itself by holding on to a tree – not very successfully – as he began to stagger and wobble and with a pirouette worthy of a top ballerina, ended up in a very undignified heap on the ground, Thudd!! – looking pretty much as he had done before.
Owww!! said the animal. Jodi asked if he was all right ‘does it look like I’m alright’ said what seemed to be by now a very disgruntled heap, ‘to think’, the animal carried on, ‘ that we of all animals have come to this, the most revered herd on the continent , the mighty elephant, the peaceful worker, the oldest ……., ‘hold on’ said Jodi, now you come to mention it I suppose you do look like an elephant, although I must say you look a little bit the worse for wear’. ‘Oh!!! do I!!’ said the elephant ‘I need a drink of beer – I’ve got the most almighty hangover’, ‘what are you doing drinking beer ? asked Jodi, his concept of alcohol was very vague but he got the idea taken in large quantities, as this elephant appeared to have done, was not good for your constitution, nor for your sense of self worth and was certainly a new take on the expression beer monster.
‘It’s a long story - that happened very quickly’ said the elephant, ‘ Jodi said he was all ears’ – then apologized for the pun, not sure how a hung-over disgruntled elephant might take it. ‘Right’ said the elephant, ‘once upon a time we, (that is the herd and I) had a nice little life going on, we pottered about, feeding, bathing, traveling round our bit of the continent, with plenty of food from the trees, and water in the rivers and water holes, then the people in the villages asked if we would help them move a few trees so they could build more dwellings, this went on for a number of years, and worked quite well, as we would work and afterwards they took us to the water and scrubbed our skin for us, sometimes we would have a little of the villager’s rice beer, which was a nice treat after a long day. but then things began to change, the trains brought in more people and then big machines bigger than us, and more and more trees began to be felled, without our help, to make way for roads, which brought more machines and people, the people in the villages started to help build the roads and buildings that were later to become an oil refinery.
We were no longer needed by these people, but our old way of life had gone, - don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind change – I am quite partial to a bit of variety myself – but our livelihood – the trees were disappearing, this caused the rivers to start to dry up and generally our very existence began to be threatened. It started off as a bit of a lark at first, we thought, oh well, the people are bound to notice that we have little food, and what is happening to the continent, we will just go and help ourselves to some of that nice rice beer that they used to offer us – it cheered us up after a day working – so it might brighten things up a bit while we wait for the people to realize what they are doing.
That is where it all started to go horribly wrong, the people didn’t seem to notice what they were doing and to boot they chased us out of the village with which we had once been familiar with, we began to get more and more worried and sad, because there didn’t seem to be anything we could do to stop this destruction, we began visiting the villages when most of the people weren’t there and raided their rice beer vats, well you know a few people are not going to argue with a herd of large elephants.
Unfortunately what was once a pleasant thing to do, seemed to make some of us angry and wild with frustration at our plight, others just got maudlin, some would go off and discuss wild ideas that might save us, which would never work in the light of day and some just got so drunk they couldn’t stand up. Invariably after one of these sessions we would all end up sleeping it off somewhere, usually a place that looked like our old habitat – which is where you came in, I suppose, so there you have it, make sense of it if you can – I can’t’
‘This is outrageous’ said Jodi ‘ I have seen so many animals, vegetables, and people on my travels, who know something’s not right, and they are the ones who have very little say in the outcome. If I were to tell you of a plan that I have been thinking about, promise you won’t get too exited,’ ‘Exited!!! Pah’ said the elephant ‘ I can’t remember the last time I got exited about anything – and that’s saying something for an elephant!’
‘right’ said Jodi ‘then I’ll begin…..’